Thinking About Moving Abroad? Here's What You Should Know Before You Decide

August 2020 - Arriving in Paris with 2 toddlers!

This time of year, many families are in the midst of a big decision: Should we make the move abroad?

Whether it's due to a job opportunity, a lifestyle change, or a long-held dream, the decision to move to another country is not simple. It often comes with a mix of excitement and anxiety, and many, many questions.

As a mentor and consultant for international families, and an expat myself, I've seen how overwhelming this phase can be. That's why I want to share a few insights to help you gain more clarity and confidence before taking this important step

1. Understand the "why" behind your move

It's very easy to get caught up in logistics—schools, housing, visas—but clarity starts with purpose. Is this move about professional growth, quality of life, family connection, or a fresh start? When you're clear on your why, it becomes easier to make aligned decisions along the way.

Just last week, a client shared something that really touched me. She told me that whenever homesickness hits (which it naturally does), she reminds herself of her "why". Through our mentoring sessions, we worked through understanding the "why" behind her move, which is to secure her Spanish passport! This clear "why" has become her anchor whenever she misses family back home. It's not that the missing goes away, but having purpose gives meaning to the temporary discomfort.

2. Anticipate emotional and cultural challenges

Adapting to a new country goes way beyond the practicalities, it's also about emotions, identity, and relationships. Think about how each family member might experience this transition, and what support systems you'll need in place.

It's important to understand that even when the move is primarily driven by one family member, everyone will face unique challenges. Each person in the family, whether it's the partner who received the job offer, the spouse who's leaving their career, or the children changing schools, will experience this transition differently. Seeing the situation through each family member's eyes and anticipating their specific challenges allows everyone to prepare adequately and support each other through difficult moments.

3. Start organizing your thoughts early

Keep a notebook or shared digital document where you and your partner can jot down questions, feelings, and priorities. This simple habit helps transform a vague idea into a real plan.

For couples, this is also the time to practice empathy exercises together. It's essential that each partner truly tries to understand and place themselves in the other's circumstances. This is particularly important when one partner gives up their career to accompany the other, as the entire family dynamic changes. Recognizing these shifting roles and being open to discussing how they affect each person emotionally can prevent future resentment and strengthen the relationship during this transition period.

4. Don't try to do it all alone

When my family moved to Paris, we initially thought we could handle everything ourselves. Like many people, we felt we should be capable of managing the entire process independently. What I quickly realized was that there's simply too much to do, and you need your mental energy and focus for the things only you can handle.

I learned firsthand the importance of recognizing what can be delegated and what truly requires your personal attention. Looking back, I wish I had worked with a mentor during this process. Now that I help clients through similar transitions, I see how much smoother their journeys are compared to mine. A good mentor helps you see situations from completely different perspectives and teaches you practical tools for making better decisions in an unfamiliar environment.

There's no badge of honor for struggling through this journey alone. Connecting with others who've walked this path before you can save not just time and energy, but also prevent unnecessary stress and costly mistakes.

This is exactly where Interoots Consulting, LLC come in. As a mentor for international families, I help people explore their motivations, anticipate challenges, and build a personalized roadmap for their relocation journey. 

If you or someone you know is facing this decision and wants support that goes beyond checklists and logistics, I'd love to connect.