Why I Left the Dream View (and Life) in Miami for a City No One Expected
- by Tati Paes
- 23 de jul.
- 3 min de leitura
What if your next move isn’t to a dream city… but to a place that feels “not-so-sexy”, and no one really understands? Not every relocation comes with ocean views, global buzz, or seems exciting at first.
Some moves lead you to places that others might question.
Places that aren’t on anyone’s bucket list.
Places that don’t feel “sexy.”
I’ve been there.
At the age of 23, after living abroad for 11 years, I left Miami and moved back to Brazil. Not to São Paulo. Not to Rio. To Curitiba.
When a friend from Curitiba saw where I had lived in Miami, she looked at me, puzzled, and asked: “Wait… why did you move from Miami to Curitiba?” It’s the kind of question that says more than words: Are you sure? Are you OK? What happened?
But here’s what they didn’t know:
I wanted to return to my country. The economy in Brazil was booming.
I had just been accepted into one of the most competitive corporate trainee programs in the country, an incredible career opportunity.
And my husband-to-be would hopefully be relocating there as well (good news: he did!). We had a plan, and we were building a future together.
It wasn’t a downgrade, as many would think. It was an intentional choice.
But still, I felt the weight of the judgment and I definitely felt the shift in status.
And this is what I’ve come to understand: The hardest part of moving to a place that’s not considered “exciting” isn’t the place itself. It’s the stories we carry.
It’s the stories we’ve told ourselves about success, identity, and what a “good life” should look like.
We start to wonder:
Am I walking away from something I worked so hard to build?
Will my family still have what they need to thrive?
Is this move aligned with who I want to become?
These questions don’t always have easy answers. But they help us reconnect with the deeper “why” behind our decisions.
And when we stop trying to make the move look right and start asking what might make it feel right.
Here are 3 powerful reflections, that I propose to clients moving to “not-so-sexy” destinations, that can shift the whole experience:
1. What are you stepping into, not just what you’re leaving behind? Maybe this move brings time, connection, or a slower rhythm that your current life doesn’t allow. Look for the gain, not just the loss.
2. What does “quality of life” really mean for you right now? This definition changes. It might no longer be about prestige or variety of entertainment options, but about alignment, values, and well-being.
3. Who are you becoming through this move? Moves that don’t look impressive on the outside often shape us the most on the inside. This isn’t just about geography, it’s about growth. When you shift the focus from where you’re going to who you’re becoming, the move takes on a whole new meaning.
In the end, moving to a place that isn’t on anyone’s “dream list” doesn’t make your journey any less valuable. Sometimes, the most transformative chapters begin in places that don’t impress from the outside, but bring you closer to who you really are.
If you’re considering a move to a “not-se-sexy” destionation, know that you’re not alone. And you don’t have to navigate it without support. Moving is a deeply emotional process. Having someone who understands the inner transition can help you find clarity, confidence, and meaning in the change.
This is the kind of transition I support families and professionals through Interoots Consulting, LLC , not just with strategy, but with reflection, clarity, and emotional grounding.
Because when a move is aligned with your values and your vision, it doesn’t need to be sexy. It just needs to be yours.
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